Well, Im back :)

So I know that most of you are probably scurrying to find your calendars wondering how the heck it could have been 18 months since I left (where did the time go??) but I assure you it wasn't. I just got home a little bit early. Here is the story :) Sorry I just copied the email of what happened, its just easier that way and sorry its so long!!

Saturday, January 22nd: 
 We were just getting ready in the morning and president called. He asked to talk to me and then told me that he was leaving his house and him and his wife wanted to talk to me. Of course I was freaking out, cause that usually means something bad. we cleaned up, i was crying and so nervous. Either I did something wrong or something happened in my family. Anything else they could have told me over the phone. So 30 long minutes later, they showed up. Immediately we went into the other room. President asked me to explain to him in detail what was going on with my shoulder and sister glazier told me to tell her exactly and honestly how much ibuprofen I was taking every day. I explained everything and told her that I have been taking 800 mg pretty consistently for the past 2 months. I cant have another problem so I was trying to hide it for as long as possible. One week I had just had enough and I called the infermera and she got me an appt (for last tuesday). I went and the doctor said that the popping and the pain, especially because its moving into my neck, is pretty weird and he wanted an x ray of the column in my neck and an MRI, and was going to send me to someone who specializes in just shoulders. I called the enfermera and she said that she needed approval from the area doctor to get an MRI. She called him and after he talked to her, he read my medical history and concluded that I needed rehab again or surgery to make things better. The church missionary policy is that if there is a recovery time, including therapy, longer than 4 weeks, you have to go home to have the procedure done and then you can go back to the field if you have a clean bill of health. He talked to president and president prayed about everything. When he told me all of this, he started by saying that he has been like a father to me here in the mission field and that I feel like one of his own daughters. he then looked me in the eye and said that if I WAS one if his daughters he would want me to get things fixed so I didnt have problems for my entire life, and thats why he is suggesting that I go home to get things fixed, is because I am one of his daughters. My heart DROPPED. I guess I had always dreamed about him telling me that I could go home on medical release, honorably, especially during my surgery, but now that he was saying it, i wanted him to take it back. I feel like this is my home. I think I almost bet money with mom before I left that I would NOT be sad to come home, but it looks like I lost that bet! Im heartbroken. Its going to be good to see everyone, but I hoped it wouldnt be like this. I cried and cried. President was crying, and hermana glazier cried too. I immediatly said, well i just dont feel like I helped a single person here. I havent really had any baptisms that I can call my own, my only baptism was a 14 year old who was inactive the next day, and right now we have NO INVESTIGATORS. Both of them looked at me and told me that THEY knew why I was here. Hermana Glazier told me that I have been her daughter here in the mission. She said that I have made the transition from not having her girls with her much easier. She said she was going to miss me as much as one of her daughters. haha she asked me to call her from the states. President told me how proud he was of me that I have stuck though everything and have still done all I can in this work. Then we called you guys. That was rough, good but rough. I was so scared that you were going to be disappointed but dad immediately saying that he wouldnt and then started crying to tell me how proud he was really helped. I know you arent going to be dissappointed. then the prayer at the end, was such a powerful experience. Thank you daddy. from the bottom of my heart. After we hung up, I was crying, president was crying and hermana glazier was crying. President looked at hermana glazier and said "can you give my little girl a hug for me?" cause he couldnt. it was so nice to have them there and be so supportive of me. also for them to express their gratitude for my work and their concern for my health. after that we told everyone in my house and they were all shocked. we were all crying. Saturday I was like depressed all day and crying. that night I couldnt sleep and in the morning I prayed so much for peace. Peace to know that what I am doing is right and that it has been confirmed by our heavenly father. Yesterday and today I have had so much peace. I know that God answers prayers and I am so grateful. 
So basically where I am at right now, is I am pretty sad. I feel like this place is my home, this language is my language and this work is what I am supposed to be doing. At the same time, I feel like there is something at home that I need to do. I feel like heavenly father knew the whole time that I would be coming home at this time. Think about it. I learned things at an excelerated rate because of the trials I had all at once, I was blessed to learn spanish extremely fast, my family had tons of blessings and now, I am not the same Summer Lawson that left almost 7 months ago. Yea I still have my same personality but I am an independent girl who knows where she comes from, what her purpose in life is and where she is going. I have realized that I dont always have to depend on the people in my life, but the first person I should always turn to is my heavenly father because he is there to help me. I have gained a testimony of the book of mormon like you wouldnt believe and I know without a single doubt that this is the church of Jesus Christ. I know that he payed for our sins and that one day we can live as a family with our father in heaven. I believe in the ordinances of the temple and I recognize the importance of attending the temple always. I know that I am a daughter of my heavenly father that loves me. i know who my real friends are and I am so grateful for my family. More grateful than I can ever express in words. I know that the most important things in life are the smallest and that if we do those things we will be blessed. I am grateful for the time that I have had here in the mission and I know that I will always remember it. I will remember it and honor it by putting into practice the things that i have learned here and becoming even more of the person I have always wanted to become. 
Well I have to go, but I just want to thank everyone for their support. I love you all so much and cant wait to see you :)


So there's the story. And here are some pictures :) more posts to come. I just had shoulder surgery and I am BORED!! so now ill let you know what Ive bee up to since I have gotten home! 

Me and Hermana Laura Coleman...she saved my life this change!!

Best district ever!! districto Ayotte

I want an El Salvadorian baby!

My favorite children ever! 

Me and sessi

I got to see ALYSSA!! 

Me in front of our ward building

Me and my companion Hermana Flores

Don't worry, I found Cap'n Crunch

One of the sisters of my last baptism, love her! 

Me and Elder Marinero, my Zone Leader

Me and Elder Nay, Greatest DL EVER, on our way home! :) haha

At the Volcano in San Salvador

The Three Gringa Amigas