Have you ever asked yourself "Who am I?"
I have.
Where are you most like yourself?
I feel like I am most like myself when I am with my family or alone in my car. No one to impress, no one watching and who cares what you are really like. Let your flaws go and just be who you are. Now the question is, why is it JUST in those places?
I was talking with the boy last night and he told me the day that he knew he loved me was a day when we were at my house with all my family and friends in my own comfort zone and wearing a sweatshirt and jeans with no pressure at all.
WOW.
You mean I dont have to try and impress everyone around me and try so hard to look cute 24/7?
When they say that stress brings out the worst in you, THEY ARE RIGHT. I have been stressed over lots of things this week, which just causes problems and causes more stress, its like a never ending cycle that I dont know how to kick. I thought that rushing into marriage or a relationship would be validating enough and just show me that someone is there, but thats not how it works. How do I let someone love me if they dont even know who I am? Heck, I dont even know who I am sometimes.
How do you just forget about the things that are stressing you out and just go back to being yourself and not caring about what people think and whats ahead?
How do you just focus on enjoying right now and everything that you currently have?
Right now, I am on the qwest to find who I really am. Sounds like kind of an easy thing right? Summer, just stop caring and do it. Well considering I have tried to be confident and find who I am since I was like 13, I obviously have some issues with it. Any ideas?
First of all, and some of you may have noticed, but I have started with cutting Facebook out of my life. I love that stupid site, a little too much sometimes, but I think the reason why I like it, is because I can look at everyone else's life. Thats not a good thing because then I start comparing myself to them and realizing that I will never be as good as them. So for now, its gone. And I am a week and counting, holding strong :) I feel a lot better too.
So let the qwest begin :)
Here is a picture of me, being myself, with the boy on Easter Sunday :) Great day.
3 comments:
you and your boy are absolutely adorable together!
and- i agree with you.. finding yourself is super hard. i am so thankful i found mike at such a young age, only because he really helped me through that high school awkward stage ya know? where you don't quite know where you fit in. but he always encouraged me to just be who i was and he helped me with it so much.
i see good things in your near future, summer dear!:)
Sum you are amazing! We all have to go through that- who am I phase. I honestly can't say that I fully found out who I was until I met Ted. As cheesy as it sounds, he completes me. I never knew a love like this before him. You are an amazing person, and if he brings even more amazingness out of you than he sounds like a keeper. Just remember that you are a Daughter of God, and although you may be wondering who you are. Heavenly Father knows who you are, your ins and outs, and that is something special. Just be patient with yourself (easier said than done I know) when the time is right you will feel completely at peace. I love you Sum!
Yes, I'm a creeper stalking your blog haha. But you're just so cute I can't help it! :) Anyway, what I wanted to say may sound kind of taboo or stupid but I feel that getting married quickly and young (yeah... we were married 5 1/2 months after we MET...) has helped me to figure out who I am as a partner easier than if I had myself totally figured out as an individual first. I mean, just like Megan said, you need to know the important stuff such as knowing you're a Daughter of God, but from there, your decisions will be based on that and things will work out. By all means, I would never tell anyone to just rush into marriage, especially as fast as I did- that's not for everyone, but if you let God guide both of you, then it's easier to not worry about what others think or how it'll work. Good luck with everything! :)
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